So, last week was Pride week here in Stockholm. I couldn't really afford to attend any events or seminars, but I did walk in the parade! Here's what I wore as a first-timer in the parade, the non-gothest I've ever been. Behold:
|Hello, I am captain Goldieboobs and my superpower is smiling idiotically until you let me grab your butt.|
I want to attempt to write about the insecurities surrounding sexuality from my own point of view.
When I was around 12 years old there was this girl that I used to hang out with a lot. And I really mean a lot, we were inseparable. I don't know how or when but at one point I realised that I had deeper feelings for her than just her being a great friend. It was like there was nothing else but us when we hung out. I don't know whether she felt the same or not and I don't think I ever will.
When high school started, we slipped apart. Much of it was my own fault - I think these feelings overwhelmed me and you were not supposed to fall in love with a girl, as a girl yourself.
In the 8th grade, when I was 14 I met my first boyfriend. It was a true love and I was very happy in that relationship. I became a Straight Girl™ and I was OK with that. I was okay with that for a very long time actually. It's easy and comfortable - society and the people around you all enforce the man-woman relationship as the norm and standard. But hey, enough about my relationship history for now. Let's move on.
The correct term for my sexuality would probably be bi-sexual but I don't feel comfortable using the term at all. Why? Because the media and the mainstream has completely hijacked the term and it no longer means "someone who is sexually attracted to/capable of falling in love with both sexes". The media and the mainstream tells you that bi-sexual means "someone handing out free-passes to party in their pants all day err'day". A bisexual's sexuality has run amok. They're sex-crazed people who are greedy and want to have the cake and eat it too. It doesn't even matter if they're in a relationship, they just can't handle themselves!
Let me make this clear: Bi-sexual=/=Polyamorous.
Therefore, I've chosen to call myself pansexual. Pansexuals can fall in love with any gender, be it binary or non-binary gender. Pansexuals fall in love regardless of sex. The key is good looks, personality and intellect. Nobody likes being put in a box and labeled. I don't want to play by the rules or be what people expect me to be. When it comes to love, you shouldn't have to.
|Me and goldieshoes Tim (@r0xp0x) celebrating at the parade!|